I listened to a podcast about lying by Danger and Play and it opened my eyes to why lying feels so bad. I've always considered lying to be wrong, and I supposed that it felt bad because it's "wrong," but that never really seemed to be a very adequate explanation. Now I know better.
Mike Cernovich, the blog's author, begins with an aphorism: "Show me what you lie about and I'll show you what you fear." He then goes on to tell us that lying isn't just wrong because it harms other people (and by the way, the average person lies 7 times per day), it's harmful to the soul because it is an admission that you are not good enough. You lie because if you don't you fear that you won't be accepted. Lying reinforces your sense of inferiority. That's why habitual liars are such miserable people.
He then challenges us to recall the last time we lied about something, and to figure out why we did it.
I told a person who looks up to me that I did something, when in reality I didn't do that thing. I was lazy, but I didn't want the person to be disappointed with me. So Monday I'm going to do the thing. Will I admit to the person that I lied? I don't think so. Why? Same reason. Something to work on, there...
Mike recommends that we tell the truth more. He doesn't seem to recommend that we NEVER lie, just that we lie less. Sometimes lies are necessary. He says that he still lies sometimes, usually when somebody is bothering him. He'll tell them what they want to hear so that they leave. He says this doesn't demonstrate fear, because he doesn't fear them, he just wants them gone. I'd say that he's afraid of somebody holding him hostage with their mouth and annoying him, but I get his point.
So what is the last thing you lied about? What do you fear?
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